So if you know me at all, you'll know that I hate the phone pretty much more than anything ever. Hello, I'm a blogger. I work best in text format, you know? Of course you know. You guys have seen my vlogs.
So today something happened that means I can show you how to react like a normal person, and not the way I did. It's for your own good. And probably mine...
Anyway, the phone rang while I was using the exercise bike this morning. I managed to actually get OFF the exercise bike, which was a step in the right direction because usually me rushing to do such things ends like this:
Me: Hello, Kirsti speaking. Random Old Lady: Yes, I'm phoning to confirm a booking?
Now, this is the point in the conversation where any normal person would say "Um. Booking?". But no, not me. Partly because I was brain addled from staggering off the exercise bike and to the phone, and partly because my parents are going away this weekend, and I foolishly assumed it was in regards to the booking for their accommodation. So:
Me: Oh. Okay? ROL: Hello? Me: Hello. ROL: Hello? Yes, I'm calling to confirm a booking. Me: Right. ROL: So what do I need to give you? Me: Um?? Is this about [insert town here] this weekend? ROL: Oh, no. The booking's for the 25th. Me: The 25th? Are you sure? ROL: Yes. And my name is [insert name here] and my insurance policy is [insert number here]. Me: Oh. Um. I think you might have the wrong number. ROL: No. The card said to ring this number. Me: Is it possible that you dialled wrong? ROL: No. Me: Well, you've phoned a private residence......... ROL: Oh. It's not a hospital? Me: No. No, it's not. ROL: Oh. But I phoned the number on the card! Me: What was the number? ROL: [insert number that's out by one digit here] Me: Oh. You've phoned [insert actual number]. ROL: I've phoned what? Me: [insert actual number]. ROL: Oh. WHOOPS. Sorry. Bye!
So yeah. That happened. Public service announcement: when you get a strange phone call, don't just assume that it's relevant to you...
So remember how in my vlog the other day, I said that I was going to be in a choir concert in March?
Yeah. The first rehearsal was last night, and I *think* I may have bitten off a little more than I can chew, thinking that I can perform a 50 minute piece perfectly with three rehearsals and one run through with the orchestra... Because there are a number of things I hadn't considered before saying yes.
1. I haven't had to read music in over ten years.
2. I can still read the notes, but I suck at sight reading the rhythms and so tend to just sing everything in crotchets or minims.
3. Time signatures now mean nothing to me.
4. I can't read key signatures for shit.
5. Italian terms (beyond forte and piano) mean absolutely nothing. Last night, the conductor was like "I want you guys to sing this giojoso". Everyone else was all "Oh, sure!". I, on the other hand, was like "Uuuuuuuuuuuh????"
6. "Can you put an operatic release on the word 'faith'?" Well, I would. If I knew what that meant.
7. When the lyrics for the soprano part get put above the stave, I completely lose track of where I'm up to. I think the only way to rectify this is to photocopy the entire score and highlight my part.
8. The tenors and basses get to sing the fun movement about sailing and storms and shit. We, on the other hand, get stuck with singing about saving prostitutes from shame. And not in an awesome, Les Mis kind of a way.
9. OH GOD, ANYTHING ABOVE AN E SEEMS REALLY REALLY HIGH.
10. I've forgotten how to breathe properly, and keep running out of breath in the middle of a phrase.
10. Basically, this is what I think the soprano part looks like:
Here's hoping that with a lot of practice before the next rehearsal - possibly including roping my brother C into helping me get the rhythms right - I don't suck quite as much. I could feel the girl next to me cringing as I attempted to find the right note, missed, and then did an awkward glissando to the note everyone else was singing.
On the plus side, this is the first time C and I have sung in a choir together in almost 20 years. Last time? We looked like this:
OH MY GOD, THE TEETH.
Hopefully we can get a more flattering picture this time around...
Any advice on how to dredge my musical abilities up from the depths of history???
No, this is has nothing to do with the forecast dusting of snow that's apparently heading in DC's direction tonight. This has more to do with me being a special snowflake.
So remember last week when I said that I realised a Stanley knife was called a Stanley knife because it was made by the Stanley corporation? Yeah. I've been having a lot of those moments since I got to the US.
1. We went to one of the headquarters of Goliath National Bank* earlier this week. When leaving, I went "Oh, they have a Goliath National Bank ATM in the foyer, that's nice and convenient for their staff!!". Yup. A bank having an ATM was surprising to me.
2. I got stuck in a toilet cubicle at Pentagon City shopping centre. The lock was kind of busted, so I have no one to blame but myself. But yeah. I got stuck. And had to yank the door from the top to get it open. And then obviously texted half of 20SB to tell them about it. General consensus? "BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA".
3. Also at Pentagon City shopping centre? I lost the subway station. There were signs everywhere pointing to the Metro. I still couldn't find it.
4. In an attempt to FIND the subway station, I followed a crowd of people all heading in the same direction. This took me about three blocks away from where I actually wanted to go, AND also led me to the middle of a car park. Well done, Kirsti. Well done.
5. Earlier this week, we went to Walmart. The number of times I had to walk up and down the baking aisle before I located the chocolate chips? FOUR.
6. I got a Kindle for Christmas. The number of times I push the 'next chapter' button instead of the 'next page' button? ASTONISHING. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to have to locate the page you were on when you do that?
7. We had a guy presenting to us the other day who was trying to give his presentation an Australian focus. So he mentioned ANZ, one of our big banks. Except that because he pronounced it Ay En Zee, it took me literally five minutes to work out that he was talking about ANZ (read: Ay En Zed).
8. I was watching the news before, which included the weather report. The weather reporter was like "And we're heading for a top of 49 degrees on Saturday". To which my response was "FORTY NINE FREAKING DEGREES?!?!?!? But I have no shorts or singlet top or thongs, and WAIT. They mean Fahrenheit, don't they..."
So...yeah. I'm clearly not going to need this any time soon:
Please tell me you guys have special snowflake moments too???
K xx
* name has been changed to protect the innocent from my idiocy.
So yesterday, we visited a couple of global businesses as part of this study abroad thing I'm doing. One of these was Stanley Black & Decker. As part of the presentation we were given, a timeline was shown on the screen, which included the invention of the retractable utility knife in the nineteenth century by Mr. Stanley. This caused me to have a lightbulb moment of "Oh my God, THAT'S why it's called a Stanley Knife?!?!?!?!?!" Yeah. I'm a smart cookie, y'all. It's taken me 29 years to work out that a Stanley Knife is called a Stanley Knife because it's made by Stanley.
Thank you, Heath.
ANYWAY. That wasn't the actual story I wanted to tell. The actual story I wanted to tell happened on the bus back from Baltimore yesterday evening. So our group is turning out be remarkably like that scene in Mean Girls where Janice describes all the different cliques. You know the scene I mean, right? So there's the Varsity Jocks (the boys shaped like inverted carrots who wear skinny jeans and tight t-shirts, and who pay absolutely no attention in class), the Desperate Wanna-Bes (the hangers on to the boys shaped like inverted carrots), the Plastics (girls who spend more time talking about shopping than anything else), and The Coolest People You'll Ever Meet (those of us in the library stream. OBVS). We seem to divide quite naturally into our little cliques, which also seem to coincide quite nicely with which degree people are doing.
Anyway, so we're driving back towards DC, and the Varsity Jocks/Plastics are making me stabby. I'd neglected to bring my iPod, so I couldn't block them out like Agatha Goodkin had. I DID, however, have my Kindle with me, which was something. But not having headphones meant I could hear their entire conversation. Which, at one point, went like this:
Plastic: "Oh my Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooood!!! AN IHOP!!!!!" Varsity Jock: "What's that?" Plastic: "An International House of Pancakes?" Varsity Jock: "WTF?" Plastic: "It's like the Pancake Parlour." Varsity Jock: "Oh. Okay..." Plastic: "I REALLY want to go there!!!" Varsity Jock: "Uh, why?" Plastic: "I read about it in a book." Varsity Jock: "Oh, okay. What book?" Plastic: [mumbles] Varsity Jock: "Sorry, I didn't hear you." Plastic: "Fifty Shades of Grey..." Me: [Furiously searches for phone to text Lor and Sweeney, then dies from repressed laughter] Plastic: "Christian takes Ana to one, and she's all "OMG, this billionaire is in the same place that my mum used to take me for breakfast!" and it's suuuuuuuuuuuuper cute, and now I want to go to IHOP!"
So yeah. That happened.
As Lor said to me yesterday when she replied to my text, "I hope she's not disappointed by the lack of billionaires and domestic violence."
So remember when I decided that it was a completely brilliant idea to leave Canberra and move back to Melbourne, and that I was going to live with my parents until I found a job? And then remember when I decided that instead of finding a job, I should go back to university and do a Masters degree, thus meaning I had no money and would be living with my parents for much longer than planned?
Yes?
The problem with these genius plans is that, a year and several months after the fact, I've basically turned back into a teenager. My parents left for six weeks in Spain on Friday, and since then it's kind of been like Home Alone, except that I'm 29.
Problems I have had since my parents left: Why is there no food in the house? Because you didn't buy food, you moron. Why are there no forks? Because you forgot to put the dishwasher on. Where the hell are all my t-shirts? In the clothes hamper, because you forgot to do laundry. Why is the rubbish bin so full? Because there's no one else to empty it but you. What's that weird smell? That would be melting plastic. That metal pan that's on the stove? It gets hot when the stove is turned on. And hot things make plastic melty *slow clap*
Whoops?
Wow, midnight already? Where the hell did the day go? Well, you didn't get up until 11.30am, so........ Where's the medium sized saucepan gone? It's in the pile of washing up you didn't do yet. Oh, gross. Don't just rinse it out and use it again. That's not cool. WE'RE OUT OF CHOCOLATE. Then go to the supermarket and buy more. That requires finding shoes and brushing my hair. I'll just make a little container of chocolate icing and eat that instead. Yes, that's a perfect and not at all diabetes causing solution... WTF IS THAT NOISE?????? O.o That would be a floorboard creaking. Perfectly normal sounds in an old house. UNLESS YOU'RE DUMB ENOUGH TO READ NOVELS ABOUT JACK THE RIPPER BEFORE YOU GO TO BED. Further proof that I've turned back into a teenager who can't fend for herself?
- My nails are currently painted black.
- I leave all my homework to the last minute, because I have 90s TV shows to watch, dammit!
- When friends tell me they're getting married, my response is "I WILL SEND YOU LINKS TO *ALL* THE UGLY WEDDING DRESSES, BECAUSE LOL FOREVER".
- I spent a good chunk of yesterday afternoon dancing around the kitchen when I should have been studying.
- Remember that scene in Easy A where she spends all weekend listening to 'Pocketful of Sunshine'? Yeah, I did that this weekend, except with this:
(Related: When the hell did Taylor Hanson get hot??)
Send help?
K xx
PS. My cousin is coming to stay with me in a few days, which will hopefully reduce the "Oh God, someone's going to murder me in my sleep!" feelings. As for the rest, I suspect I'll just prove a bad influence on her, and then we'll have TWO adults who can't take care of themselves to deal with instead of one...)
*WARNING* This one is going to be even more picture heavy than usual. Sorry...
And so we come, as we inevitably must, to the conclusion of my (ridiculously longwinded) series of posts about my trip to the US. It's only taken me, what, four months to write about my six week trip. #GENIUS
(Incidentally, I was convinced that "and so we come, as we inevitably must" was a quote from something, so I Googled it. Apparently it's only nerds like me who use that. And people who write fan fiction about WRESTLING. *head explodes*)
ANYWAY. My last full day in Colorado, Lyndsy and I headed up to the mountains to look at the leaves. We started out by heading to Guanella Pass. The trees on the drive up were pretty spectacular up close. I *may* have almost fallen down a hill because I was looking at the trees while trying to change the lens on my camera, with the other lens clasped between my knees. #classy
And the view from the top of Guanella Pass wasn't too shabby either! It WAS rather chilly though, so we didn't stay too long.
From there, we headed for the Peak to Peak Highway via Central City. With no GPS to rely on, our navigation was courtesy of print outs from Google Maps. Needless to say, things got slightly confusing when we took an incorrect turn in Central City. Especially as Central City has a ton of one way streets. But it worked out pretty well in the end, because we came across this random old cemetery that's filled with aspen trees.
It was quite fun to wander through the trees and find graves hidden amongst them. Or it was, until we came across this propped against a tree:
Karen Warner. 'Til death do us part?
It's like the creepiest marriage proposal of all time. I mean, seriously. Why the hell is there a question mark?!?! O.o
We then came across this, which made us both laugh a little harder than it should have. Mostly because at first, I thought it was the middle finger that was raised. And then because they felt the need to clarify that "home" meant UP.
We eventually made it to the Peak to Peak Highway, and - along with half the population of Colorado - came across this patch of trees. We nearly got hit by a people mover from Kansas being driven by people who were either incredibly blind or just didn't care that there were pedestrians standing where they wanted to park their car. But it was worth it, don't you think?
From there, we went past another couple of 14,000 foot mountains before arriving in Estes Park. Upon arrival, we almost had an accident courtesy of a shit ton of elk (that's the collective noun for elk, right??) on the golf course, which people were stopping in the middle of the road to take photos of. We, being sensible individuals, drove over to the parking lot of the tourist information centre and walked back over to the golf course. At one point, we had to walk across a bridge and stopped to look at the salmon (?) that were trying to jump up the weir to get upstream. IDIOTS. After being amused by the doomed-to-failure salmon for a while, we turned to keep walking towards the golf course, and were met with this:
Cop standing nearby: Just stay where you are, ladies. She wants to make a right.
Lyndsy: How does he know??
Me: Maybe elk have indicators?
The cop was right - apparently this particular elk was too lazy to jump the fence, and so was wandering up through the crowd to a gap in the fence. We stood around taking pictures of the elk for a while. There were a couple of males there, so there was some bugling going on, which was pretty cool. Sadly, I didn't think to use the video mode on my point and shoot because I'm a moron and left it in the car.
Bugling!
Check out those insane antlers
Dawwwww, baby!!
This just made me laugh
There's only so much elk butt you can look at without getting bored. So after a while, we headed up to the Stanley Hotel, which was the inspiration for The Shining.
The miniseries that was made in 1997 was actually filmed there. We were too cheap to actually do a tour (partly because one had just started, so we would have had to wait a millionty years for the next one), so we wandered around the foyer, peered up the staircase, bought a tacky postcard for my brother and headed off in search of ice cream. On the way to find ice cream, we found more elk. These ones used a zebra crossing rather than just walking into the road. That was weird. (NO ONE MAKE JOKES ABOUT HOW ELK AREN'T ZEBRAS. I'LL HURT YOU IF YOU DO.)
Anyway. We ended up in one of the many ice cream stores in town, and decided that milkshakes would be easier to drink on the trip back to Denver. They were delicious, but good GOD they were expensive! (Correct me if I'm wrong, but over $7 seems excessive, yes???) Upon arriving back in Denver, we picked up Lyndsy's husband from work, and headed out to dinner at a Mexican restaurant near their house. The next morning, which I foolishly assumed was my last day in America, I realised that I hadn't ONCE eaten mozzarella sticks. On mentioning this to Lyndsy, we decided that it needed to be rectified. So we went out to lunch at a pub near her house.
OH. AND. On the way in, there was a bus stop. At the bus stop, a lady was sitting with her toddler. Her toddler was rolling his large toy truck down a ramp and into the road, then walking out between parked cars to get it. #parentingfail
Waitress: What can I get you guys?
Lyndsy: I'll have [insert food here. I know it involved deep fried pickle bits].
Me: And I'll have the mozzarella sticks, and a side of mac and cheese.
Waitress: Anything else?
Me: *joking* Yeah, I don't think there'll be quite enough cheese involved in my lunch, so if you could sprinkle a little extra over the top...
Waitress: Sure thing! *walks off*
Lyndsy: I don't think she got that you were joking...
Me: Crap...
My mac and cheese was certainly very cheesy. On the plus side, it didn't taste like bonfire.
What an appropriate way to finish my trip to America - with a nice dose of heart disease ;)
K xx
PS. If you've missed any of this ridiculously drawn out series, you can check them out here:
The day after we arrived in Boston, I woke up feeling like someone had gone over my throat with razor blades during the night. I had high hopes that it was just the effect of the air conditioning in the hotel room, and stuffed a bunch of throat lozenges in my mouth. After making good use of the hotel's buffet breakfast (complete with waffle machine!), we made our way over to the nearby train station. There, we bought train tickets. I was forced to use a $20 note for a $10 ticket, and received my change in pirate gold.
Also known as US $1 coins.
We headed to downtown Boston, with the intention of walking the Freedom Trail and seeing Boston's significant historic sites. Wheeeeee, nerdiness! Sadly, it started to rain as we got out of the train station at Boston Common. Thankfully, I'd thought to pack the $7 umbrella that I'd bought in Chicago, although we couldn't fit all four of us under it. We decided to hide out at a Starbucks for as long as it took us to drink a coffee and see if the rain passed. So of course, the rain waited until we left the Starbucks, and then got worse.
We decided to at least walk the two blocks to the Bull & Finch Pub, which was the inspiration for Cheers. We hid under a portico there for a while, and took some photos of ourselves with the Cheers sign outside.
Bloggy friends FTW!
When the rain hadn't eased, we decided it was time to change our plans. Instead of starting with the Freedom Trail, we caught the train over to the New England Aquarium and hung out with some sea beasties for a while.
Paulie patting a stingray
Australia: here be dragons
When we'd finished at the aquarium, it was still raining. (UGH.) We headed in the direction of Faneuil Hall. On the way, we stopped off at a 7-Eleven for the purchasing of umbrellas. I bought a packet of tissues because my sore throat had progressed to snottiness that required immediate rectification.
Clerk: That'll be $1.03
Me: *hands over $1 coin and 3 pennies*
Clerk: *stares at $1 coin* I don't think this is real.
Me: I got it from a ticket machine in the subway! Who would forge $1 coins?!
Clerk: It looks too shiny to be real. Do you have a $1 bill?
Me: Oh, for the love of God...
It would seem that pirate gold is not legal tender in 7-Eleven...
Upon reaching Faneuil Hall, we decided to be tacky tourists and eat at the recreated Cheers. Paulie wanted to ask the waiter if he knew his name. Kat, Lauren and I begged him not to. The food was decidedly average. We wandered around the stalls at Faneuil Hall and then decided that we needed chocolate, so headed to Godiva, where this happened:
Lauren: I'd like a chocolate coated strawberry please.
Clerk: That'll be $7.
Lauren: *has heart attack*
Me: I'd like a chocolate coated strawberry please, and one of the raspberry truffles.
Clerk: That'll be $9.
Me: *has heart attack*
Paulie: I'd like four chocolate truffles, please.
Clerk: That'll be $8.
Paulie: *is smug because he got more chocolate than we did for less money*
Also, Lauren had decided that she didn't want to carry a handbag around all day. By the time we reached Faneuil Hall, she was a little sick of having pockets crammed with stuff. So she asked for a bag at Godiva. Then turned it into a handbag. Genius, no? (It was somewhat worse for wear by the time we finally got back to the hotel)
The rain had finally stopped, so we picked up the Freedom Trail. We headed past the Old State House and the Old South Meeting House before coming across a CVS. I was in rather desperate need of cold and flu tablets by that point, so we stopped in there so I could obtain some, a shit ton more tissues, and a bottle of water. Paulie hadn't been into an American pharmacy before, and was totally intrigued by how it was basically a supermarket with less fresh produce and more drugs. For some reason that now escapes me, we went to the TJ Maxx over the road after we left the pharmacy. Kat modelled this truly awful stunning hat and wished she had an event to go to that required the wearing of such a hat:
Sorry, Kat. It's too horrific a hat to keep to ourselves!
I, in the meantime, felt like I had a head full of cotton wool, and was struggling to get my cold and flu tablets out of the packet. They weren't a standard blister pack, but I was convinced that if I pushed hard enough, the tablets would pop out regardless. Instead, I wound up basically turning one of the tablets to powder. Assuming it was a lack of strength, I made whining noises and a pathetic face at Paulie.
Something like this. Also? OH HI, DAVID TENNANT. WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?
Also also? Source.
He took the packet from me, actually LOOKED at it, and discovered that you had to peel off the thick backing paper before you could pop the tablets through the foil. Cold and flu tablets: 1. Kirsti: 0.
We kept wandering along the Freedom Trail, eventually reaching the Granary Burying Ground.
Me: Oooooooh, cemetery! Can we go in? Can we can we can we can we?
Everyone else: If it will shut you up, YES.
It was totally worth it. There was a guy buried in there named Increase Sumner. Best. Name. Ever. From there, we headed past the Park Street Church to the Massachusetts State House.
Yes, we're very mature. Why do you ask?
Then we went to Finagle Bagel and bought a bagel we didn't really want just so we could see this happen:
Pretty awesome, no?
Then. THEN. THEN came quite possibly the nerdiest thing I've ever done.
Me and Lauren: We need to go back to Beacon Street and find a pizza place somewhere near there.
Paulie and Kat: Um, WHY???
Me and Lauren: SO THAT WE CAN PRETEND IT'S BEACON STREET PIZZA.
Paulie and Kat: What are you talking about?
Me and Lauren: Um, Two Guys and a Girl. DUH.
Apparently not everyone watched a rather obscure 90s sitcom as religiously as we did... But everyone SHOULD because it stars Ryan Reynolds and Nathan Fillion and it's AWESOME.
Yeah. That happened.
By the time we finished our (frankly, delicious) pizza, it was time to head to Fenway Park. I've had about ten different people ask how we managed to score tickets to a Red Sox homegame. To them (and you) I say, I looked up the dates we were going to be in Boston in about June, went onto the MLB website, and bought them. That was it. We were sitting between home plate and first base, so they were pretty great seats. Sadly, the rope that holds up the mesh that stops the people behind home plate from getting hit in the face with baseballs ended up in all my photos as a result.
That said, it was a really enjoyable game. Sure, the Red Sox lost, but we got to sing Take Me Out to the Ballgame and Shipping Up to Boston and eat vast quantities of soft serve out of helmets for a very reasonable price!
Ice cream dishes make excellent hats!
Course, we then went and spent a millionty dollars on Red Sox themed nonsense in the shop, so the memory of the reasonable price swiftly faded into the dim dark past...
Up next, the most ridonkulous museum of EVER, pizza that had to be drained before consumption, and we go to Haaaaaaaahvard.
Contrary to popular belief, I am still alive. I'm currently on a train from Washington to New York. Sadly, there's no Wifi on the train, and Wifi at our hotel in New York is $13.95 A DAY (WTF?!), but I have high hopes that I'll be able to steal make use of some poor unsuspecting person's unsecured internet to at least post this, because I've been an epic slacker of late. [It didn't. I'm now in Boston...]
I don't really know where to start with Denver. Perhaps with the fact that it was about 10 degrees C hotter than Chicago when I arrived. And I was wearing jeans. #terribleidea Or perhaps the fact that Hello Kitty takes on an ENTIRELY different meaning when you're talking to a three year old who pronounces her Ks as Ts. That, incidentally, was a couple of days after I arrived, when Lyndsy and I took her little cousin to the zoo. Small children and their amusing speech impediments aside, the zoo was fun. Insanely hot, but fun. The tigers had just been fed when we got there, so we got to see them chewing on enormous chunks of bone. And the hornbill was going crazy, flying all over the place.
The Sunday after I arrived, Lyndsy had a Pampered Chef party, and I inadvertently bough $60 worth of cookware #whoops (It's okay, it's all small stuff that'll TOTALLY fit in my suitcase!!)
Obviously, with me being me, a trip to the museum was on the agenda. I was crazy excited mildly entertained to find that the palaeontology curators in Denver are just as smutty as the ones in Chicago. Sure, they may not have had a rape-tosaurus or skulls with knobs on them, but you could "Fondle a foot", and there was a "Bone Bar" that asked you to please touch gently. *snigger* (Lor/Sweeney, does making smutty jokes equal a #hosuspension??)
The museum also featured the largest gold nugget ever found in Colorado.
Lyndsy: Wow, look how big that is! Me: Awwwwww... It's so little and cute!
Largest gold nugget ever found in Colorado:
(Replica of the) Largest gold nugget ever found in Australia:
About a week after I arrived, Lyndsy and I went to the Taste of Colorado Festival downtown. It was kind of like the Multicultural Festival in Canberra, only with Denver based restaurants. I'm kind of sad that I missed out on seeing ASIA play on the Friday night, solely because Heat of the Moment reminds me of a very entertaining episode of Supernatural. I also missed out on seeing Boyz II Men play on the Monday night. I'm not particularly sad about missing that though. Anywhendredidtheyfindthosebands, the Festival was fun. And being a total failure of a blogger, I neglected to take photos of anything. Which is probably for the best, because I have a sneaking suspicion that I mostly just ate cupcakes. They were mini cupcakes, so it was okay that I ate like four different kinds. Oh, and I ate beignets. I passed on the alligator, the pickle on a stick, the rattlesnake bratwurst, and the deep fried turkey drumsticks. I *did* get some food from the first Indian restaurant in Denver - established in 1989 #really??
Eventually, the Festival became exhausting, so we headed over to the Art Gallery, because it was the first Saturday of the month and therefore entry was free. #epiccheapskate They had some pretty fun pieces, including this salt cellar:
New aspiration for when I'm an actual adult (rather than the fake kind that I am at the moment): to own a salt cellar shaped like a sailing ship. Because it's AWESOME.
The following Monday was a public holiday in the US (Labor Day, which should totally contain a U, for those of you playing at home). The Rockies happened to be playing at home, so it was time for America's favourite pastime: baseball.
Baseball = cricket, only BORING. I'm pretty sure more time was spent changing sides than was spent actually playing baseball... Oh, and this happened:
Announcer: Please be upstanding and remove your hats for the national anthem!
Me: Australians all let us rejoice for we...oh CRAP, wrong country... *stands around awkwardly*
Despite all of that, and the fact that I managed to get a one inch strip of my right leg sunburnt, it was pretty fun. I have no idea what the score was in the end. I *DO* know that the Rockies scored at least seven home runs because there was a big fireworks display on the big screen about how that meant we could now get free tacos at Taco Bell. I also know that they didn't win. But I sang "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" like a champion, and did my best to avoid sniggering during the line about rooting for the home team. #thingsthatmeandifferentthingsindifferentcountriesdespitebothbeinginEnglish #longesthashtagever
So after I left Sweeney, Lor and Penny at Navy Pier on Monday afternoon, I realised that I had about 36 hours left in Chicago, and way too much still on my list of things to do. I had high hopes for going up to the zoo seeing as how it's free and all, but sadly there was insufficient time :(
On Monday night, I headed up to the John Hancock Observatory to watch the sun set over the city. That was pretty awesome. The audio tour was narrated by David Schwimmer, which was a little disconcerting because I kept expecting the information about Chicago's landmarks to include the line "We were on a BREAK!!" at regular intervals...
Anyway, the view from the top is incredible. And being up there for sunset was pretty cool. I think I may have elbowed a small child out of the way to get a decent spot at the window to take photos. #whoops
The something-or-other building. I have no idea. Anyone know?
Sunset over the Chicago River. And, you know, Chicago...
I then went to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory at the base of the John Hancock Building, and ordered a weight management salad (cos I'm ALL about the dieting. What?) and a side of macaroni and cheese in an attempt to get over the trauma of the mac and bonfire that we'd had at lunchtime. The waiter may have laughed at me when I ordered. Clearly, he's never needed to get the taste of mac and bonfire out of his mouth... *jealous*
The next day, I got up to find it tipping with rain. After unsuccessfully trying to wait it out at my hotel, I was forced to make a mad dash across the street to 7-11 to buy an umbrella. By the time I'd done that, it was thundering. It made walking a mile down Michigan Avenue rather interesting, that's for sure!
I finally made it to the Art Institute in one (slightly squelchy) piece. And I had an awesome time there. Do you guys ever play a game at museums and art galleries where you pretend that you're insanely rich and can take home one thing from each room?
I have no idea when I started playing it. I have half a suspicion that it's something my mum the teacher would have invented to make sure that we were paying attention to the objects and reading the text labels and generally learning stuff rather than aimlessly wandering around. If it *was* my mum (HI MUM!!!), at least it paid off - she got a museum curator out of it!
Anyway, I played said game at the Art Institute the other week. And thank God I'm *not* filthy rich, or my house would need to be much bigger than it is, because i would now be the proud owner of the following:
a Mayan stelae,
several Monet paintings,
a couple of grandfather clocks,
Grant Wood's American Gothic,
a medieval necklace in the shape of a dragon,
a half suit of armour from sixteenth century Italy,
a Van Gogh self portrait,
a frieze of donkeys from the wall of an ancient Egyptian tomb,
some Chinese bronze water vessels,
a painting of an orange grove in Spain,
a truly awesome library ladder (though sadly not of the slide-y variety), and
this painting, solely because of the completely ridiculous hat that (male) baby is wearing:
Awesome... I hope he gave his parents hell for this painting when he grew up.
Of course, it stopped raining during the four hours I spent in the Art Institute, and started again the minute I left... And the rain was even harder than it had been on the way down there. When the rain started coming THROUGH my umbrella, I decided it was time to take shelter under the portico of a nearby office building. Still, by the time I got back to the hotel, my shoes made squelchy noises and my socks were so wet that I had to wring them out in the bath #funtimes #ew
But despite the thunderstorms, my last few days in Chicago were awesome. Well...except for the part where I dragged my suitcase three blocks in the wrong direction on my way to the airport because I threw out my map of Chicago at the hotel. And the part where I asked someone where the train station was and he gave me a weird look and then pointed about two metres to his left #FAIL But, ya know, other than that, it was great!! ;)
Seriously though, does anyone else play that game? Or am I a crazy person?? :S
